Groupism

I often find that people tend to make a group of friends and they are content with that. They jealously guard that group and it is difficult to be accepted as one of them. Some of it is through fear of change, lack of self-confidence and a kind of need to guard against all incomers which might change the dynamic of the group.

I call it ‘groupism’ and it can be very alienating and unfriendly just as other types of ‘isms’ can. It is ok if you are in such a group and feel protected and loved, but as christians we should try not to do that and embrace all newcomers and welcome them. Some churches are said to be unfriendly because people try to join in but feel that they aren’t truly accepted because everyone seems to cling together in cliques and the friendliness is superficial.

Clinging to people you know and like is natural, but a challenge for us is to look out for everyone and let them know that they are welcomed and loved. One of my pet dislikes is when a group of people in the church take over and hog the background tasks. They don’t like to include others and are critical if anyone tries to join in and help. We should be on the lookout for this and try to involve people who might want to help but haven’t the confidence to muscle in and make their presence felt. Also opening up our house groups and meetings to all who are interested rather than filtering them into people we think will ‘fit in’ would be better.

It is easy to be around a group of friends we know and love, but we need to reach out and extend our friendship to those who seem to need help fitting in.

God bless you and reward you for your love of the stranger,